Valentines day
by iamsesshomarusfluff
Summary: I know this is late... but my computer is slow.. so this arrived slow. But it's a sweet One-Shot between Sesshomaru and Kagome on Valentines day.


Ugh. Valentines Day. My least favorite holiday. Want to know why? Because I can't have her. Her, as in Kagome, by best friend since before I can remember. And just my luck, it's today. Today I have to face the one that I would die for, the only one that can read through me, the only one I allow. Today I have to see ever guy in our school go up to her and ask her to be theirs. I have to see her through away piles of valentine cards from secret admirers that could only dream of having her. Just like I do. Every time, I have to fight back the urge to go and rip out their hearts. But every time, I'm there to protect her from those who just won't take no for answer. But why won't I, who seems to have more of a chance then anyone on earth? Simple. I'm afraid. Afraid she will reject me, afraid that she will crush my heart, run it through a shredder, and I won't be able to put the pieces back together. The one that I die to have is the one I'd die without.

Her family hasn't been the best for her either, which is why I protect her from things she does to herself. Like slicing her wrist open. I've been with her for so long, that once she tells me what happens, I know almost instantly when and if she's going to do it. Her family doesn't even care if she ends up in an alley way dead. No, they would just take her things and see what they could sell so they could have more to shoot up their arm. I protect her from that. She knows that she could always come to me, I'd always be there. I have to be, because if she's not, then my world stops. It will stop and it won't ever be able to start back up again. So, she has her own room in my house, which I share with my father, and half brother. Her room is beside my, across the hallway from my brother's and down the hall from my father.

But her life wasn't always so bad. In fact, if it weren't for her parents being friends with my father, I wouldn't have met her. My father and her parents used to be great business partners. They became good friends outside of the business and Kagome and I became instant friends. Of course at a young age, still in dippers young age. But when her parents decided to leave my father, in hope of standing on their own, it didn't turn out so well. They had to go bankrupt and sold the company, leaving them broke and desperate. I never once left her side, never wanted to. And she never left mine, even when my father moved on and had Inuyasha, also one of her best friends. I used to despise him, but she taught me not to, and sooner or later, I came to accept him. All because of her.

But on this holiday, the holiday that is all about love, I hate it. With a stronger fiery passion then the one I have for her. So, here I am sitting in first period, waiting for her to take her seat behind me. That's the usual order. I don't have many friends, so I don't waste my time hanging around a group of people I don't know. So, I sit in first period, waiting for her to finish chatting with her group of friends, which consisted of Sango, Kikyo, and Kagura. The warning bell rings, and as I expected, she came over and sat down behind me. Though something was wrong. Her attire was not what it usually is. This is a pair of black pants she bought from Hot Topic, or black jeans. Or the usual T-shirt she wore with it. No, she was dressed much different. He had on a black and red plaid skirt that reached mid thigh. She wore her usual boots that belted and went up nearly to her knees. Her shirt was more form fitting. It was red and a picture of a metal cross was on it. She wore black arm warmers and her hair was braided in pig tails. This caught me off guard and I couldn't help but star. This was a big change, and I found my self liking it more then wanted to. Though nothing betrayed in my expression, but I was sure she could read it in my eyes.

She glanced up at me, her pale skin seemed smoother and her eyes was done up in black eyeliner and shadow.

"They" She said while referring to her friends. "Made me do it." She explained.

"Why?"

"They said something about it being Valentines Day. Hate it."

"You know, you could still have refused."

She sighed and leaned back.

"I know." She lifted her head and locked her eyes with mine. A jolt ran through me as I tried to contain the emotions swelling in me.

"You don't like it?"

Hmmm, perfect opportunity. I couldn't resist but tease her a little.

"So, you did all of this for me?" I asked with a smirk. I knew she would probably yell and hit me in the arm. We did it all the time. Though how she reacted wasn't what I expected.

She blushed. She blushed and turned away, looking at the board.

"You did answer my question."

The smirk immediately vanished, and the look of realization set in. She did. She dressed up like that, despite her loathing of skirt, especially that short, for me. Could she… No. Impossible. There was no way she could like me, no. I refused to believe it. Not just because I didn't want to get my hopes up, or because of the fact that there could be a chance, I just didn't want to take the risk of it. She was the constant of my life, what kept me going. She was the purest thing in my life, and I wasn't about to taint it, or push it away.

"I love it." Was the only thing I could respond with, and be completely honest about it. And I was.

When school was over, I went to the turn around in the back of the school, where she usually sits and waits for me. I had just about every period with her except lunch and 4th period. So, we meet up here, where her father usually picks her up when she's not coming home with me. But even when her father picks her up, she still comes over, and most of the time she sneaks out to.

One time, she snuck out at night. It was near mid night, the time where everything in her house gets settled down and quiet. She had climbed out of her winder, and walked the 15 minutes to my house, which is not far from the school. It was in winter, so the air outside was bitter cold. I wasn't to happy about that. She somehow had managed to climb up the pillars and onto my balcony. I was on my bed, reading a book in the dim light of my lamp across the room. I was just starting on the next chapter when I heard her knock. Her pale skin glowed in the night, her lips were blue from the cold and her small frame was shaking as she shivered. I jumped up and let her in, wrapping a blanket around her. She hugged the blanket closer to her and sat down on the edge of my bed. She looked down and I realized she had been crying. More worry washed over me and wondered what happened for her to come over this late. If she had any intentions on staying the night, she would have come home with me. But she went with her father so, I knew this was unexpected. I ran a hand through my hair as I sat next to her. I still wanted to scold her for this. But I knew better.

"Aren't you going to yell at me too?" She asked just above a whisper. "For being stupid and not staying at home?" Her voice broke, and I could tell she was fighting back tears.

I wrapped my arm around her shoulders and brought her into a hug. She grabbed my shirt like there was no tomorrow and buried her head in my chest. And I could them. Her tears. I brought my other arm around her and rested my check on her head, inhaling her sent. Lavender and roses. When she calmed down, which wasn't much later as she has been hanging round me to much, I let her lay down. She was exhausted, emotionally. When I got up, she turned her head and I looked down into her red, sad eyes. She grabbed my hand and stilled it. I slowly sat back down as she stared at our hands. She traced the inside of it with her small fingers, sniffling.

"Don't leave." She whispered.

I knew what she meant, and I wanted to protest. That would be completely inappropriate, and I didn't want to put her in that kind of position. But she lifted her gaze from our hands and her eyes filled with tears again.

"Please?" She pleaded.

I sighed, went to turn off the lamp and climbed back into bed. She scooted over so that way, she was between me and the wall. As soon as I got comfortable, she rolled into my arms. And that night I didn't get any sleep. I lay there, with the girl that held my heart, in my arms. That night changed everything. I thought about what I was feeling, how this was what I wanted, how this felt so right. But I couldn't. I wouldn't put her thought it, though of having to fight with her family, having to fight with school. No, she was to precious for that, to me.

Why I thought of that, I have no idea. Maybe because she was thinking of that same memory, trying to figure out what I was thinking the whole time, like I did days after. It wouldn't be the first time it happened. I walked up and sat beside her. She sat up with her back against the wall; listening to the mp3 player I gave her. Her legs where out stretched, but crossed over. When I sat, she sighed and opened her eyes. The volume was low enough to hear it, but hear what people where saying at the same time. She turned her head and looked down the road. There was deep sadness in her eyes, and her sent said she was getting depressed, or was that way already.

"Is your father coming?"

"I don't know."

"Do you want to come over?"

She gave a dry laugh, though she still refused to look at me.

"I always want to come over."

When she still didn't look at me, I got up. But I wasn't going to leave like she thought I would. No, I got up and turned her around, that way her legs were hanging off the edge of the ledge, and that way she was facing me. She stiffened and looked at me with a blank expression, trying to read mine. I didn't know what she saw there, nor did I care. I just wanted to know what was wrong with her.

"What's wrong?" I demanded more then asked.

"Why, what ever do you mean?" She spat sarcastically.

"Enough Kagome. Tell me what is wrong."

"What if you don't want to hear it?"

"Kagome."  
She didn't say anything, but looked over my head, and pondered. I looked at her, waiting, knowing that she would tell me anyway. After a while, she sighed. It was a quiet, defeated sigh, and it scared me. She never gave up on _anything_. Even her parents. She leaned down and wrapped her arms around my neck. She pulled me closer to her, forcing me to rest my head on her shoulder. I rested my forehead against it, inhaling her sent and letting her run her fingers through my long silver hair.

"Valentines' day. The day dedicated to love, where couples let the love known for the other. And it all started with a sacrifice. A sacrifice for one man's love, and now the very thing I want, I can't have. And I hate it. I never told you why I hated valentines' day, and that's because of the fact I can't have what I love. And I love you, Sesshomaru." She whispered.

With those small, simple words, everything I thought earlier vanished. I had hoped she returned what I felt, even if it wasn't as powerful, I just hoped. I loved this woman, and she loved me, so why try to deny it? Why make ourselves suffer, when we both wanted it. If she didn't love me, I wouldn't force it upon her, or put her on the spot. No, I would let her be, and love anyone she wanted. But it was me she wanted. ME! My arms tightened around her, holder her closer. I turned my head and nuzzled her neck, inhaling her sent. I chuckled, and I heard her sigh.

"You don't have to laugh at it. It's hard enough-"

She was cut short as I lifted a finger to her lips. Then I slowly with drew my head from her shoulder to look at her in her eyes. Her beautiful blue eyes. They held tension and hope. I smiled wickedly and replace my finger with my lips.


End file.
